The Perfect-Enough Wedding

In my opinion, the process of planning weddings is based on an unrealistic and unattainable illusion of perfection.

The media (such as Pinterest, bridal magazines, Martha Stewart and David Tutera) inundate us with varying interpretations of how to have a “perfect wedding:”

Pantone color schemes.

Wedding themes: burlap or bling?

DJ vs. band?

First look or not?

A dress that costs as much as what your parents paid for the down-payment on their house.

Table linens that match the flowers that match the dresses.

Belly-bands on the invitations.

Well-toned arms.

More often than not, the underlying message is that if you don’t have or do <fill in the blank> your wedding will be less-than. Not what you’ve envisioned.

Not perfect.

As much as we stress over every detail, circumstances beyond our control inevitably throw a big ol’ wrench into the works on Our Special Day:

The weather is uncooperative.

Your maid of honor misses her connecting flight.

The flowers are not what you ordered.

Your third cousin brings a newborn who screams through the ceremony.

The best man forgets the rings back at the hotel.

You get your period.

Ugh.

I’ve witnessed lots of things that could go wrong at weddings I’ve officiated, and have helped to soothe a lot of upset brides. We often forget that there are only a handful of requirements for a wedding: a couple in love, the officiant, a license, and two witnesses.  Everything beyond that is gravy.

No one will remember the color of the napkins, whether you provided flip flops to dance in, or your signature cocktail. They will, however, remember the abundance of happiness and love there was that day.

Let go of the need to have everything just so. The goals for your wedding day include getting married and having fun at the party. Nothing more.

I promise that your wedding day will NOT be perfect.

But it WILL be perfect enough.

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